Back to the cake thing, there are several reasons that this is a lie.
One. I’ve had some pretty freaking good cake, cake that you suck the fork to get all the cake off of it and press the crumbs together for just one more bite because the cake is that good. However as good as that cake was, I’ve never really tasted a cake that was better than sex, even the really bad sex was still better than the best cake I’ve ever had. Well maybe not… nope the worst sex was still better than the cake. No I’m not going to tell you about it, this is about cake not sex.
Two. If any food not just a cake were really better than sex then that food would be the only food people on the planet would ever eat. As there are lots of food which are not cake I’m going to stay with the idea that no cake is better than sex. No food is better than sex. Hell there isn’t even just one kind of cake. No cake is better than sex.
Two point five. If you say the icing is better than sex, well someone should just slap you. Because icing isn’t cake it’s sugar and sugar and more sugar and a little bit of colored water. Sugar isn’t sex and it certainly isn’t better than sex. Sex won’t give you cavities but icing might. And pixies sticks will just choke you and make you all twitchy. And that’s no fun.
Three. You shouldn’t eat cake any more times in a day than you have sex. In fact if you would like to keep having sex then you should only eat cake about half the number of times you have sex in a day. If you don’t have sex, then you get no cake. If you have sex just once, no cake. Twice on the sex, once on the cake. Well not on the cake because that would be … well not really good for the cake… it may not be bad for the sex.
Four. You really shouldn’t have sex on a cake that is just really messy. Yeah messy is the reason you shouldn’t do that. However why do partially clothed people pop out of cakes? Hmm… still not the strange thought of the day or about things you might eat. Yeah I know you’re kind of scared to ask now, still not going to go there.
No it wasn’t about sex and food … well not completely unrelated… but it wasn’t about sex and food for sure. It wasn’t even about food just things … that you… well might eat but really probably shouldn’t. Yup we’ll leave it at that.
Back to the point, no cake is better than sex and if you think that one is well you probably aren’t really having enough sex or you aren’t doing it correctly. Yeah I’m think that must be it. So put the cake down and practice the sex stuff and if you practice twice you can have the cake later. However, if you are having sex twice a day do you really have the energy for cake?
Five why would you name a cake better than sex? Because if you are thinking about cake do you really want to be thinking about sex? I mean yes people say mmm while having cake. Some people say it a lot while eating cake. However, mmm only gets said at the beginning of sex and it usually ends with the screaming the name of some higher power and grabbing handfuls of mattress. Cake doesn’t end like that at all. Well unless you are doing it on the cake but that is more of the end of the cake than having cake ending that way.
So in conclusion, cake is good but it isn’t better than sex. Not even cupcakes. No don’t even go there. I said no.
That’s all for now, other stuff tomorrow
Happy Birthday if it’s your birthday and a very merry un birthday if it isn’t your birthday. Not even birthday cake is better than sex.
Thank you for reading, please subscribe, you know if you are reading this on blogspot or on diaryland. If you are reading on face book well you are already subscribed. Aren’t you happy.
Have a great day and play nice in the neighborhood.
Ciao,
Listening to: Counting Crows
Gamer Tag: invisible don
PO Box 4425 Roanoke VA 24015
No comments:
Post a Comment