Thanks to PITT, Temple, Astate, UCONN,

Well it is Friday and I just got back from the lawyers office -- oh yeah -- so I will be done with the parental's bull about this stupid piece of land and I won't have to hear another word about it ever again -- oh yeah baby -- because they will never agree to do anything together.

So I have procrastinated and procrastinated and procrastinated -- well you get the point I'm a slacker. I would rather screw off than do anything productive -- yet I seem to obligate my self to do all these wonderful things

Why

I like laying around watching T.V. playing PlayStation (which I haven't done in a really long time -- like weeks before the beach trip -- tell the priest not to bring the PlayStation)

I'm not a priest either -- thought I wanted to be -- but a certain young lady presented a rather strong argument against that choice

What can I say she really made her point well. I recall that she made the point three times that night.

Plus can you imagine an invisible priest -- the host just sort of floating there -- creepy


OK I shouldn't poke fun at the priesthood it is a very serious ... profession, calling, order, something or other


Well that is neither here nor there - I didn't continue in the seminary after that and began my personal crusade to be ... what the hell was it I wanted to be then .. doesn't matter .. why because I didn't do it ..

My students are a bit odd this semester I have 3 classes at the college 36 in one class 20 in another and 15 in the other class. They just look at me and don't say anything -- well the invisible thing does keep them guessing where the hell I am but as long as I'm talking it shouldn't matter


Here is something you can do to make teachers, instructors, professors uncomfortable. Now it takes practice and you can't break off but look at them as if their fly is down -- they will eventually break and have to check


Get that I really don't understand what you just said look on your face when the teacher looks at you -- this is better than a question to get a teacher to not continue in the lecture -- try it and see if they don't say does everyone understand this -- then you have to say no --


Or pretend to raise you hand and when they say what to you or ask you what you want -- say I didn't raise my hand or I was just moving my arm


OK I guess that is enough classroom mayhem for now


I've noticed a lot of schools on the stats so that's why I included harmless classroom entertainment -- you need something to help keep you busy or awake in class -- oh here is something fun that I used to do in college


I graduated with honors in undergrad and had a 3.67 in grad school I know if worked harder it would have been better


Anyway the thing I did was well first I would sit in the back because they expected bad students only in the back


Ace the first test and then all the bad students who are back there anyway notice that hey you got an A


-- next test they are all looking to copy off your exam


-- I'm not saying cheat -- but if you can make a few bucks by making the answers visible enough for everyone to see hey there you are


-- make sure you mark a few wrong and then change them later so you don't look like the guilty party -- in the cheat thing --


oh and if they don't pay you by the third exam or final mark them all wrong then change the answers after they turn in their tests.


-- I had to do that once -- it benched the entire first string of our college basketball team -- man did we suck without those guys --which does open up the market for making some money on a game or two with the bookies


Not that placing bets is a good thing to do but if you have a sure thing hey use it



Thanks to PITT, Temple, Astate, UCONN,

and a few other for stopping by the site



I promise I'm going to do a g-book update soon I really need to because its getting big oh and Sunshine17 was number 200 on the g-book 100 and 200 OCD rules


Well I'm out for now I actually have to go do something which goes against my slacker code so don't tell anyone

The yet further still adventures of invisible don King of the Bastards

OK I'm feeling much better today -- thanks for asking.


The doctor gave me meds and now I am a medicated invisible don


No you can't see the pills go down either.


So why is it that every one wants to cover me in things like chocolate. I just don't understand


So being at home all day when you feel bad is not as much fun as I remembered


Being that I don't take ill that often -- despite my bad habits


So I remember that being home sick when I was in school was a whole lot of fun -- except for the being sick part -- but I usually stayed at my grandparents and they would be extra nice to me -- ginger ale and chicken soup -- that was so cool


I miss them a lot but such is life and they have gone on -- not that --well I won't go there right now it all goes back to capitalizing or not capitalizing a certain entity's name or not and I don't want to get that deep today.


So I am on my third lawyer trying to resolve my unwanted inheritance, hopefully I will be able to resolve this neatly and quickly and in a cost effective manner --


I have had my faith in our legal system tested severely over the last few months -- no offence yankeebell -- I know not all lawyers are heartless, soulless, uncaring, your time is less valuable then mine, dirty snakes in the grass but the ones I have encountered lately have been not what you would call helpful.


So I wonder if I give up the inheritance do I lose the title King of the Bastard or not --


We rather think we should keep the title not that we have many responsibilities but we do like having subjects. It is so nice to see our loyal subjects giving praise. (it's the collective we and our referring exclusively to me invisible don King of the Bastards)


The peacemaker hasn't spoken to me and the other one is speaking to me and has placed himself in a bit of a spot involving all of this -- because the peacemaker called the other ones wife about all of this and she said good for him (him being me invisibledon) its about time that someone finally stood up to them (the parental).


See the parentals don't particularly like the other ones wife which I don't really understand because she is really nice and the other one is really happy so I don't see the problem -- but I didn't think they would actually say and do the things they have done over the last few weeks and months and years


OK i did know they would do it I was just kidding myself into thinking that because they had this biological link to me that they wouldn't --


I was watching the croc. hunter last night -- and saw it very clearly


our relationship (the parentals and me) is more or less reptile in nature-- here you go you are alive now, you are on your own -- if you come around at feeding time and we haven't eaten you might be the main course --


now that's love if you can't be huggable you might as well be digestible.


Well I have to get some work done before I leave today -- so see you all later and if you haven't figured it out yet I have a computer at home now so I hope to update more if I can not be so damn busy -- I'll sleep when I'm dead

At home not feeling well.

Im home sick today -- ah poor poor me -- "sniffle" excuse me


anyway Im sure I will have time to update a bit later

Invisible Army Mission two

OK tomorrow (8-28-01) is Invisiblepal's birthday


Go to her site Invisiblepal and Wish her a HAPPY BIRTHDAY


Thanks she will be very happy or hate us either way it will be fun

Invisible Army Mission One

OK I didn't get number one last week lads and lasses -- but I'm in the number one spot right now so I would like to keep it that way -- Invisible Army mission number one -- keep invisible don on top of the top 50 sites list link at the bottom of the page --


-- OK that is all dismissed recruits --


how do you like my field commander voice -- pretty cool eh ( I put the eh in for you Canadians)

I'm such a slacker

So over the weekend I’m out with the golfing and fishing buddies


Turns out that one of them that I don’t see much and don’t really know well, but looks really familiar.


Why does this man look really familiar? I’m going crazy trying to figure it out.


Well I circulate around the gathering and later we are talking about being raised in the Catholic school environment. No we didn’t go to school together.


Turns out he is a former NFL lineman for the Rams while they were in LA


And the one golfing and fishing buddy I hang around with the most is a former Pro baseball player


The remaining golfing and fishing buddies are just the run of the mill golfing and fishing buddies. Which still perplexes the hell out of me because I don’t golf and I don’t fish.


Well NFL buddy asks if I ever played football – now I’m not that big – He is just being nice – I say yes I played Defense line in High School and then played Rugby in college


He says “ You are a sick Muther – Rugby is for psychos”


I smile and know that he really means that


You don’t make it to the NFL without getting the hell pounded out of you – so I know he at least respects me for that.


Which is cool, because I really wanted to ask for his autograph but I resisted the temptation. I also have not ever asked pro baseball player buddy for his autograph either.


Baseball buddy did ask me to help him coach a little league team with him because he need someone who had played behind the plate to work with the catchers – we had two really good kids for the position and one really bad one.


So anyway that was Saturday night I didn’t do anything else over the weekend but housework and college class prep – both of which I am seriously behind on – I am such a slacker.

I know you are shocked – I’m shocked

I know this in not my typical entry, however I am going to write about something I don’t normally write about

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Sex and related issues


I know you are shocked – I’m shocked


But I have been noticing something


No not that most people in D-land are perverts


I don’t think that at all – and it’s not because I’m a prude


It is just a part of my life that I don’t talk about much – mainly because I want you to read not fall asleep.


Hahahaha


OK anyway back to my subject – I tend to get sidetracked if you didn’t notice


First – I need to say THANK YOU to the person who invented the thong


OMG


You know I’m not normally one to look at a woman’s posterior and say WOW


But lately I’ve been noticing the thong here and there and everywhere


My mind has been like Joey Lawrence “WHOA”



Plus the thong has accessories – now underwear jewelry in theory sounds pretty dumb – well not until you see it for real – it is definitely something you can’t look away from


Then all the hip high pants (or what ever they are called) with the thong straps riding higher on the hip then the pants (is it hot in here)


Where was I – oh yeah god bless the thong


I don’t want to sound sexist or pigheaded (or is it too late now)


Either way I need to have my revos a little more handy if this fashion trend continues.


OK I tallied my guest book entries 1-157 Chickenpie has the most entries with 25


Thanks to all the new people coming by 125 page views yesterday – oh yeah baby


Oh and please keep voting for me on the top 50 sites this week I’m at number 2 right now PLEASE Vote and this isn’t like the presidential thing vote as often as you like I think it lets you and if I can help you with any little tasks let me know

Drive by the rules

You know what I hate -- it's the idiot in front of me who never turns on the damn turn signal


What the hell oh you are going to park there well you know maybe if you would signal -- I would let you have enough room to park but because you can't drive by the rules Im not going to let you park


Im not moving back an inch nope


you will have to drive around the block againg and hope its still there


No I didn't really do that but I wanted too -- you cant be to careful these day who you piss off in the car -- you might just get shot


Hey it happens. you never know -- boy I miss the good ol' days when you could drive up beside the stupidest &%^%(*&)% person in a car and just shout WHAT THE PHUCK DO YOU THINK YOUR DOING and shoot them the bird too


Then go about your merry way


Today you try that right about the time you raise the bird to full attention Johnny who cant drive for phuck pops a cap in your ass now that just sucks


oh well Im out of here and off to bed soon 4 am is early

The first rule of Project Mayham is ...

OK so it's only Tuesday but it feels like it should be Saturday


One of the accountants just returned from Turkey and brought back two boxes of candy -- not your typical stuff -- but I do like them --


So if you are ever in a shop that sells Turkish candies I would say ask to have a sample if possible


if not they are good but if you don't like them I'm sorry


Hmmm littlecutie Hey welcome back how was your summer?? Are you back in school now?


To answer your note first I would prefer chocolate syrup over the green slime - just a personal preference


Second why would you want to cover me in chocolate syrup, but at least you didn't suggest oh I don't know molten steel.


Third -- I think you would be able to see me but whenever I have been covered in chocolate syrup -- well I've never been covered in chocolate syrup a girl poured a 2 litre of sprite on us during ... well that's a different story


invisiblepal Hey where have you been? Are you doing a disappearing act on me -- how is school? work? pool? et al


I'm still busy as hell and I am beginning to worry about my mental stability -- I saw part of fight club this morning getting ready for work the office scene were Ed Norton beats himself up in front of his boss and I wondered --- hey now there is a way to get out of all these meetings


Only one problem being invisible would anyone notice what was going on and then when the authorities got there would they know where I was or if I was hurt or just making it up and well there are a lot of what ifs and but that's to the situation.


However it was all beginning to sound pretty good to me -- yeah


The first rule of Project Mayham is ...


Well then sadly reality sank back in and I got my things together and came to work and then I began the day feeling somewhat better about myself and thinking today would be a glorious day one in which I could really smile and feel good about it all


but no -- work has to be like work -- always phuckingitallup can't have anyone having a good time don't you know that would be wrong that would upset the natural order of things which can not allow for a bright and happy episode.


That's not true I do have a good day from time to time like yesterday after work I went to the dentist -- I like the dentist because the ladies in the office flirt with me -- the dentist thinks its the funniest thing because they talk about it all day before I even get there and then when I am there everything but my visit stops until they start working on me -- which is getting to be less and less because I am taking good care of my teeth -- I should really just let them go and I could be in there all the time


However I think that if I had a mouthful of nasty teeth they would like me less and talk to me not at all.


The assistant didn't get a chance to do her hair this time either but it was different than the last visit. You know they put pictures on the ceiling so you have something to look at while your in the chair -- I think that's pretty cool


I would tell you who my dentist is but that would be bad for my invisibility.


OK now I have to get back to my work stuff Oh and the college has a check for me -- So hey this might not be such a bad day after all and I'll do a guest book update later in the week -- thanks for visiting and signing in I really like that Oh and I have a banner Have you seen it if so let me know what you think OK thanks OK now I'm gone Honest you can go on about your regular stuff now .... no really I'm gone

Invisible Don - King of the Bastards is looking for someone's head. Do you have it?

I don't like meetings -- they do very little but piss people off except for the person in charge of the meetings


They must think meetings are cool I guess


-- Being that I have the power to actually call meetings I don't


You know why

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.

.

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.


That's right because they suck that's why


No one wants to go to a meeting


No one remembers anything from the meeting other than they didn't want to be there


Before you can leave the god awful meeting you are in -- You have to schedule another one of the phucking things


or they ask if you want to head or be apart of some committee so you can have other meetings to go to


I only have one question -- whose the jackass who decided in order to get anything done we have to get into a group to belittle each other and not say the things we really think first so we aren't really doing what we should be doing. ??? How smart is that?


Because if i could find you I would put your silly head on a pike and parade it up and down Wall Street. GRRRR


OK I'm better now -- I think you guys have a nice day -- I won't you know why


that's right I have to be in a %#@)(*&%&%$ meeting the rest of the day. But I do have a dentist appointment later too.

Later I'm going to lunch

Well I just finished my week of meetings today -- man I hate working on Saturdays it really screws things up and the museum is getting to be a real pain in the ass -- We need money so if you have an extra K or 2 write me and we'll discuss how you can make a donation if not just keep reading me and I'll keep reading you and we'll all be happy


On the southern saying from the last entry -- I don't say that but I hear it


here is one for today that is appropriate to the time look at posting time


Ja-eat-jett == meaning did you eat yet


no I'm leaving in a minute to do just that very thing


if you just say no to ja-eat-jett you will hear


juntoo


meaning do you want to.


later I am going to lunch

The honcho, The cheese, The big kahuna

So I was just at one of my several meetings this week


I'm early (OCD!) one of my annoying traits to many and one other member of the faculty is also rather early he must be (OCD) too.


So we have a rather interesting conversation about riding trains.


I enjoy it and I think passenger train service is a rather cool way to get around -- none of the phucking bossy we are too damn busy for what you might need attitude of the airlines.


Well maybe some -- but the airlines as a whole are .... well they are just snobs ... so what if you fly the plane - guess what if it crashes you're just as dead as me and most likely it is your damn fault.


anyway I'm off the point.


My meeting - me and the other OCD are there chatting and in walks a third person who is early - OCD? maybe but it is rather close to the meeting time about 12 minutes now


Well we, the first gentleman and I, continue our conversation -- about riding trains not bitching about airplanes. that's just me on a rant


So then the third guy chimes in and we are all having a nice talk about it all


Well more people arrive and number 1 OCD talks to someone leaving me and the 3rd person to chat Well I introduce myself and he himself


OMG it is the phucking president of the college. He is new and in all the storys that have been sent via campus mailing and newspaper articles have not included a photo. I recognized the name barely.


Now I'm thinking -- did I rant about something or not? Did I swear -- no pretty sure I didn't -- But damn here this guy is, just chatting away about the trains and he's the honcho the cheese the big kahuna, So I held it together very well and was on my best behavior during the meeting


None of my normal fidgeting, cracking of joints, etc. I even took notes and chimed in -- very well too -- at the meeting.


So then after the meeting I'm walking out the door and He slaps me on the back with his notes and says "have a good day" and then I did the typical lackey thing "oh you too SIR"


Well he is the President and all I should show him respect but I think he wanted to avoid the whole formal thing in the meeting


But I think it went very well all and all and now a bunch of Dr's know who I am on the campus


While I remain invisible in every other aspect of my life I am now feeling rather visible and vulnerable there now. Like everyone is watching me and is going to say oh yeah you're that guy.... what ever the hell that means being that guy.


Well I bought a super fast computer 1 GHz processor -- this muther is fast -- here is a southern analogy for fast


its faster than greased owl shit


-- what the hell is that about --


however I did see an owl this morning right before sunrise that was very cool


OK now I have to get some work done and turn on the AC because it is hot maybe I'll change clothes. No peeking

A conversation between me and the other one

The Other One: http://www.industryclick.com/microsites/index.asp?srid=10114&magazineid=7&SiteID=3

Invisibledon: what's that

The Other One: Its an article by Telephony Mag about us

Invisibledon: oh

Invisibledon: OK

Invisibledon: well you are doing better than the other company

The Other One: just a sec

Invisibledon: OK

The Other One: The other company is basically gone. we are getting about 10000 business orders migrated to our network

Invisibledon: cool for you

The Other One: yeah

Invisibledon: nothing like knowing you have some job security

The Other One: basically that the restructure is going to work and not kill the company

Invisibledon: that's good -- so was your manager happy with your compliment call yesterday

The Other One: I don't know if he called or not

Invisibledon: oh

Invisibledon: see no one gives compliments but they sure like to complain if you mess up

The Other One: that's for sure

Invisibledon: When are you guys going on Vacation?

The Other One: Sep 15-*20

The Other One: 21

Invisibledon: OK

The Other One: Did you know that (cousin and his wife) are coming in on Labor day, I don't know about (Cousin's brother -- the one that does commercials)

Invisibledon: yes I think you may have said something about that before

The Other One: I didn't I just heard last night from the peace maker

Invisibledon: well I heard it sometime but I'm not sure when maybe from the peace maker during his last scathing verbal assault and promise to beat my ass cause I am the KING OF The BASTARDS.

Invisibledon: are you going up?

Invisibledon: hey whats your wife's work site web address

The Other One: HTTP://WWW.SOMETHING SOMETHING.com

Invisibledon: ah there we go -- the msn search engine links weren't working

Invisibledon: How was the skiing in (Canadian Place) --like (other Canadian Place)or different

Invisibledon: I see the peace maker is doing the big sky trip next year

Invisibledon: I'm going to smoke BRB

The Other One: Different but Big - (Other place in Canada) village is enormous The Gondola starts at the base and traverses the base of 3 mountains. Look it up and see if you can find a map

Invisibledon: yeah I;m looking at the trail map now -- oh and Im back from the smoke break now too

Invisibledon: Is your wife working today?

The Other One: Yes but not willingly

Invisibledon:oh how so

The Other One: She had to go they are restructuring the office , possible GM being canned

Invisibledon: oh really

Invisibledon: that's not good when the top guy bites it

The Other One: The top guy is a suck up and does work that just looks like work or steals work that should be done by somebody else

Invisibledon: so he needs to be canned then

The Other One: yes

Invisibledon: ah I see

Invisibledon: so are you going to be a group leader this year?

The Other One: No group leader for me until (the other ones child) can go along

Invisibledon: ah I see -- The peacemaker is still doing trips.

The Other One: I guess I think so

Invisibledon: Big Sky trip last Club trip

The Other One: Cool for him

Invisibledon: Yeah it is

Invisibledon: I emailed your wife about a trip

The Other One: He had to back out last year

The Other One: she should respond

Invisibledon: yeah cause he blew out his knee

Invisibledon: I'm thinking about the (Canadian)trip in (Winter)

The Other One: cool

The Other One: How much is it

Invisibledon: $$$$ or something like that

The Other One: a piece

Invisibledon: I guess

The Other One: you should give ( his wife) a call at the house around 5 if she doesn't get back to you

Invisibledon: why?

The Other One: So she can help you book it or if she can do any thing cheaper

Invisibledon: Well I was going to use her as the booking agent

The Other One: She should be able to help you get a good price but I don't know on the club trips might want to do individual trip

Invisibledon: really

The Other One: Yeah she can cut commissions easier

Invisibledon: Could she get a better deal on the group trip

The Other One: I don't know

The Other One: Let me call her

The Other One: in a bit

Invisibledon: OK

The Other One: lunch at 1

Invisibledon: who you or her

The Other One: me

Invisibledon: oh OK

Invisibledon: I gotta go to the art museum I'll be back later

The Other One: cool

Invisibledon: OK I'm back

The Other One: Major TT just a sec

Invisibledon: OK

The Other One: cool I'm done , shot my lunch to shit

Invisibledon: yeah that sucks huh

The Other One: yeah kinda

Invisibledon: what did you have

Invisibledon: or are you having

The Other One: Singapore rice noodles

Invisibledon: I had vegetable beef soup and yogurt (peach)

The Other One: you are a Peachy freak

Invisibledon: it's kinda of a theme of the week -- the peach thing that is

Invisibledon: they are good

The Other One: yes they are --- freak

Invisibledon: me the peach freak

Invisibledon: did you get to talk to your wife ? I called but she was in a meeting

The Other One: She must be pretty busy she is not at her desk -- she seemed kind of aggatated when I last talked to her let me talk to her when she calls me or tonight

Invisibledon: she was nice in her e-mail reply to me

The Other One: She covers good

The Other One: What did she say

Invisibledon: well its so hard to tell mood in an email without imoodicoms

Invisibledon: :-D

Invisibledon: I have a banana too

Invisibledon: oh she just said to call her later -- scroll back and you ll see what you asked

The Other One: (wife)said to give her a call tomorrow and I will talk to her tonight

Invisibledon: OK

Invisibledon: did you just talk to her

Invisibledon: it will be in the afternoon because I have meetings in the morning.

The Other one: D She leaves at like 2

Invisibledon: oh well after 11 anyway it wont be first thing


Well he got busy and I have to leave for the day so that's where it ended.


Have a good weekend -- I'll do a guestbook update later.

I can't think

OK I am still so busy I can't think but I'm taking a minute to update and really about a minute. But do these really count as updates -- well yeah they get counted and you will come by and see what I had to say and then be like -- damn they need to lighten up on this guy and let him update you know -- well I'll see what I can do about that for you my faithful readers


Oh and I have a dentist appointment on Monday -- if you haven't been reading that long, go back to May or my faves in the older page and read "will you quit flirting .... " that will explain it all


Oh and keep up the NOT Don Walker stuff he is not our fave DJ -- Why because he is a major cornball not funny trying to be funny guy and I wanna be on the radio and I think he will do it if he get enough sign ins that say what is the deal with this "not don walker stuff" and he does a website Wednesday which could get d-land on the radio but that's just gravy Z101

Thanks!

You all are the greatest


OK gotta run later

Im going to do that anyway

OK I'm still to damn busy but I'm losing it so I'm stopping for a bit and then I'm going to go smoke


Yes its true I smoke


Yes I know its bad for me


Yes I know I will die -- but I'm going to do that anyway


OK enough depressing stuff Guestbook update


Well I really don't have too much to say but I want to change how my diary looks -- I'm thinking about a new template and junk but I'm not sure


So here are somethings to vote on -- write me in my guestbook and let me know an if you re Don Walker -- you are still not funny Z101

sign and tell him he not your fave DJ


OK so back to me what do you like or not like


Lake picture

template

Prev-next changes

Swordman -- I like that so too bad if you don't

girl at the bottom

Vote for me on the top 50 sites list PLEASE!!!!!!

Guest book

Notify list



Guestbook update

Hey You! Yeah YOU! you are here everyday why not just add me to your fave list. It would make us both happy you because you just go to your buddy list and bam there I am and me because I have you on my people who like me fave list. See its a good deal


You know who you are.


Everyone else you guys are great OK you too you re great too


OK who has been here


chickenpie AH! Christina Shank-u-what-a -- Now that's just mean -- I mean she is like a very .... oh I'm too hurt to think about it ....




OK I'm not that was kinda funny -- but she still looks better in a mid riff than Britney


AmandaOk I'm better now I smile see SMILE OK maybe you don't see it but I'm smiling trust me look close or highlight it you'll see. Thanks though


sunshine17 thanks to you too you care so much .... I don't know what to say sniff... Oh yeah I do how was MEXICO?


lobo21 hey no problem that's what I'm here for -- i 'splain things pretty good huh -- may be that's why I teach -- nah that's not it -- man two bucks times 24 teeth times two kids wow that's a tidy sum for a little kid too bad the toys they like cost at least that much each or at least the really cool ones.


strybooksgrl who knows how I got there I click on stuff and then I go there simple -- I'm not a code breaker honest


No seriously I'm not


No really don't you think I would have more stuff in here if I was -- ok -- you had a cool site anyway


lip cool idea about the review I don't think I mentioned that in here anyway and the sweetie and darlin's you sure know how to boost an ego -- thanks doll


lobo21 yeah again you rawk on the not don walker thing


sunshine17 you too girl you rawk too


and anyone else who did it you are cool man


Action figure I missed the x game darn -- I hate being busy -- oh and cool pic on your site its so down to earth -- crayons are cool


OK others who have been lately

savecraig

mishegoss

halfdevoured

snowgrrl

brokentoy

daystars

lolashowgirl

looking

jeska

and these places or servers


ipt.aol

sdca.home

ruhisunet

kitgoldennet

Tucson

Snadiego level 3

omah us west

midsouth

dns data channel

olston

crusio.com

dayton ohio

Sitemeter

splitrock

nycrr

ixpress

maine rr

Buffalo

USC

midamerica net

pandoraisinet



I'm am sure I have left things out -- but now Don Walker is coming on the air now -- I m so torn the radio station is cool but man he is not a good DJ there are only two things he does that I like he does on the air --

today in history and


when he stops talking and plays the music


OK I'm going to finish up a few things then go home to get ready to go to a meeting tonight at the college

Right now my life sucks

ARGH -- I hate being busy like this -- Right now my life sucks ok -- I need to go smoke thanks -- Oh I still love you guys who read more later if not today tomorrow for sure

I wouldn't be so busy

I think I am slowly going insane.

Nope, I'm not.


Too bad for me then I wouldn't be so busy.

Most accidents occur in the home

When is it not safe to dance?


In a mine field


On an ice covered slope?


In the shower -- remember most accidents occur in the home --mainly when you're doing stupid ass stuff like dancing in the shower



But you can dance if you want to


We can Dance We Can Dance


Its the Safety Dance


Men without hats

What starts with F and ends in uck

Due to technical difficulty the page you may have viewed over the last few days was not what I intended -- now I think I have things back to normal -- my normal not anyone elses


My day is starting out like that and I am not ready for that I think the museum gig is going to be up soon -- My heart is just not in it anymore.


For now I have to run there will be more later


oh one quick joke


what starts with F and ends in uck


.

.

.

.

.

Firetruck


oh I know but hey its quick and easy to remember

NOT DON WALKER

Hey if you are a faithful reader of invisible don or even if you are not a faithful reader


Please do me a huge favor


OK got Z101 Then go to the guestbook. Then sign in however you want, use your d-land address or mine, and where it says fave DJ Please Enter


NOT DON WALKER


if you could do that Oh I would be oh so happy -- OK thanks I know you'll make me proud

What the hell am I talking about

OK short one -- today but more later I'm sure -- I'm at home on the computer -- yes I know it is sad that a little thing like that makes me happy and to top it all off its my 100th entry. I had such great hope for that one -- oh well sometimes we just tend to put things up to high and then when we see it, it is just not as beautiful -- oh what the hell am i talking about -- I started this and then I remember it was my 100th entry -- like I'm going to wait until I have something better to say -- like that will happen --hahahahahahahahahahahaha


Oh well thanks for reading me - later Invisible Don

I know that means nothing really but it's one of those things I like to hear

Thursday -- IT'S HOT Guestbook update


So my little boring life has been very busy lately.


Not any less boring just busier, all the boring little things I do have seemed to pile up onto each other.


I wonder if this is due to the fact that I put things off to much.


Nah that wouldn't be it at all.


I was walking through the Art Museum today and noticed that one of the pieces in the "Roanoke City Art Show" is a photograph of someone I know. How odd.


Making it odder still -- is that this kid bit me back when I used to work at a youth center.


I was walking in the center and this kid runs and slides across the floor and wraps her self around my leg and bites me


I was "what the #&^(^$*$ is that about" and the little so and so scurries off and hides under a table


Well not to be out done -- I got out the TASER and zapped the little ____________ into submission.


Well that's not true -- I went and got a shot and avoided the kid after that day


Now I get to see her in the Art Museum -- oh Joy!?

__________________________________________________


So this is entry number 99


I spent the morning reading reports in between reading perceptions He is funny most of the time. He also seems to be very similar to savecraig

being that perceptions is longer I think maybe is something was copied it would be the latter that was guilty of stealing the idea. Or they could be the same person -- who knows or is it just that two guys with the same idea -- which is entirely possible because men do share the same brain. I hate that too because someone is always using it when I need it.


_________________________________________________


Oh no and Nsync was bumped out of number one by Sum 41 on TRL. HAS THE WORLD GONE MAD -- just kidding

___________________________________________________


Guestbook update


Chickenpie Hey Thanks for the edit work on the Bunny pic --why is everyone so freaky about the easter bunny.????


Sunshine17 Et Tu Sunshine scared of a 6 foot rabbit -- what is the world coming too



On the topic of the bunny suit more women than kids wanted to sit on my lap -- which I thought was very strange -- even the newscaster from Channel 7


anyway


Amanda Hey thanks for the sign in have a great time on your trip


Invisiblepal Finally someone who likes the Easter Bunny -- I wish I could help you with the plastic grass thing but Santa's elves have this union deal where you have to buy the stuff by the ton -- I tell you Santa is taking over the whole holiday market -- the rest of us holiday mascots are pooling together to fight the fat rat bastard and keep him in his own damn month -- I'm mean hell he has the thanksgiving thing all sewn up already and by the gods..... uh ... Sorry I'm off the point - more chocolate hey that I can do no problem


pink-milk Thank you Thank you -- because you signed it twice


Jenn Thanks I'll get that fixed -- and darlin' too WOW I know that means nothing really but it's one of those things I like to hear


Sunshine17 yes again glad your happy -- you re never happy are you sure you're OK


greenicoyote Hey Happy Birthday -- I hope they don't make another one -- lord the first one had like 6 -- yikes


ok other places


I've gotten a ton more google hits -- not a ton like 5 but hey


Daystars

tampabay which is summer I think

someone from Boston

someone from nyc.rr

someone from Dayton Ohio

someone from Buffalo.edu

Action girl

brokentoy

Jeska

snowgrrl

and augustdream


there are a ton mor like 100 in the last week I know that's not Uncle Bob numbers but its getting there


Spread the word tell people you love me invisibledon oh OK love is a bit strong like


enjoy


read sometimes


ok


tolerate


oh OK reality check you just humor me so that I don't feel bad about myself


Hey but I can live with that


and remember sign my guest book and you can get a link from ME

I know its shameless self promotion but I can live with that too.



Have a great weekend everyone I'm off in an hour and half - oh yeah

I know that means nothing really but it's one of those things I like to hear

Thursday -- IT'S HOT Guestbook update


So my little boring life has been very busy lately.


Not any less boring just busier, all the boring little things I do have seemed to pile up onto each other.


I wonder if this is due to the fact that I put things off to much.


Nah that wouldn't be it at all.


I was walking through the Art Museum today and noticed that one of the pieces in the "Roanoke City Art Show" is a photograph of someone I know. How odd.


Making it odder still -- is that this kid bit me back when I used to work at a youth center.


I was walking in the center and this kid runs and slides across the floor and wraps her self around my leg and bites me


I was "what the #&^(^$*$ is that about" and the little so and so scurries off and hides under a table


Well not to be out done -- I got out the TASER and zapped the little ____________ into submission.


Well that's not true -- I went and got a shot and avoided the kid after that day


Now I get to see her in the Art Museum -- oh Joy!?

__________________________________________________


So this is entry number 99


I spent the morning reading reports in between reading perceptions He is funny most of the time. He also seems to be very similar to savecraig

being that perceptions is longer I think maybe is something was copied it would be the latter that was guilty of stealing the idea. Or they could be the same person -- who knows or is it just that two guys with the same idea -- which is entirely possible because men do share the same brain. I hate that too because someone is always using it when I need it.


_________________________________________________


Oh no and Nsync was bumped out of number one by Sum 41 on TRL. HAS THE WORLD GONE MAD -- just kidding

___________________________________________________


Guestbook update


Chickenpie Hey Thanks for the edit work on the Bunny pic --why is everyone so freaky about the Easter bunny.????


Sunshine17 Et Tu Sunshine scared of a 6 foot rabbit -- what is the world coming too



On the topic of the bunny suit more women than kids wanted to sit on my lap -- which I thought was very strange -- even the newscaster from Channel 7


anyway


Amanda Hey thanks for the sign in have a great time on your trip


Invisiblepal Finally someone who likes the Easter Bunny -- I wish I could help you with the plastic grass thing but Santa's elves have this union deal where you have to buy the stuff by the ton -- I tell you Santa is taking over the whole holiday market -- the rest of us holiday mascots are pooling together to fight the fat rat bastard and keep him in his own damn month -- I'm mean hell he has the thanksgiving thing all sewn up already and by the gods..... uh ... Sorry I'm off the point - more chocolate hey that I can do no problem


pink-milk Thank you Thank you -- because you signed it twice


Jenn Thanks I'll get that fixed -- and darlin' too WOW I know that means nothing really but it's one of those things I like to hear


Sunshine17 yes again glad your happy -- you re never happy are you sure you're OK


greenicoyote Hey Happy Birthday -- I hope they don't make another one -- lord the first one had like 6 -- yikes


OK other places


I've gotten a ton more google hits -- not a ton like 5 but hey


Daystars

tampabay which is summer I think

someone from Boston

someone from nyc.rr

someone from Dayton Ohio

someone from Buffalo.edu

Action girl

brokentoy

Jeska

snowgrrl

and augustdream


there are a ton mor like 100 in the last week I know that's not Uncle Bob numbers but its getting there


Spread the word tell people you love me invisibledon oh ok love is a bit strong like


enjoy


read sometimes


OK


tolerate


oh OK reality check you just humor me so that I don't feel bad about myself


Hey but I can live with that


and remember sign my guest book and you can get a link from ME

I know its shameless self promotion but I can live with that too.



Have a great weekend everyone I'm off in an hour and half - oh yeah

OK I hope this works (it did)

Ok it worked This is me Invisible Don -- subletting as the Easter Bunny

You don't own a TV

Where do artificial lemons grow?

Do they grow in a lemon hatcheries?

Do they grow in lemon factories?


Where do artificial lemons grow?



OK so its not mine but I remembered this jingle from a commerical it was for dish washing soap with a reggae beat -- well if you never seen it, I guess that means


1. I watch too much TV


2. I'm older than you and I watch too much TV


3. You were out of the country for a year


4. You don't own a TV -- nah that can't be true


5. Ok I just watch too much TV

The Other Ones wedding Part 3 -- The Final Chapter

Today is Tuesday August 7th 2001 Guestbook update

OK I have a ton of work to do but you know what


That's right I'm not going to be doing any of that anytime soon -- I have a headache and I want to type it away


So as promised The other one wedding part three


So the wedding was HOT

The reception was at Mount Vernon -- coincidentally Invisible Don is related to the first owner of that estate -- His grandfather Augustus is invisible Don's very own Great Great Great Great Great Great

Great Great Grandfather -- how about that for insignificance --seems that an niece of the first GW in that office wed a certain member of my illustrious family and then moved out of the Westmoreland region to live in the wildness


Anyway -- back to the Reception -- we decorated the car and then did the normal reception stuff --yadda yadda yadda -- it was very nice and the food was excellent however the action was something less then -- well it could have been a lot more fun


It is so hard to plan a party for 5 years olds to 80 year olds and everything in between -- so as far as that went it was a good party -- but invisible don needed more and so did several other people


So the plan was to go back to hotels and then meet in Old Town


Well I am with the other ones now brother-in-law


Yeah the great navigator from the other night at the bachelor party. Well his skills hadn't improved much in a day either.


So we get ready and He and I don't really have anything nice enough to wear out to Old Town unless we travel an hour back to the other ones house -- not going to happen


So we drive in to Old Town -- DC area -- we have a car this time that has a tags, registration and driver all from the same state this time too.


Well now Brother in law to the other one is not sure what club they went too


So we figure we will walk around until we find them


Mind you we are in Old Town -- dressed the same -- in Christian Dior Tuxes -- looking rather dashing


Yeah that is if only one of us had on the tux -- but no we are dressed the same -- exactly the same -- cuff links, button covers -- every thing is the same


So we look like a -- well we don't exactly look like we are out to find a few brides maids and the rest of the wedding party --


So there we are walking up and down the streets in and out of clubs trying to find our party


All the while discussing our situation


"What do you mean you don't remember where they were going"


"I don't remember"


"Oh Geez this is just like last night"


"What do you mean"


"You couldn't find the right club last night"


"Well excuse me"


Then we would talk about something else for a bit and then get back into our frustrating conversation -- because we didn't know each other well -- not even 24 hours at this point and now we are dressed alike in Old town having a conversation which I'm sure sounds like a couple having a fight and that's what it looked like to everyone we passed.


Once we noticed that we were the target of some rather unwanted attention


We finally picked up on just exactly how we looked we decide to bag the Old Town Adventure and head back to the Hotel and hang out with the not so adventuresome people of the wedding -- that's right the 5 year olds and 80 year olds. Everyone else was somewhere else and we couldn't find them


Turns out we had a better time because no one really listen to where we were supposed to meet so everyone was just wandering in and out of clubs all night looking for the other people -- its just dumb luck that none of us were in the same place at the same time or that we bumped in to each other on the street


Well that's it -- the next day the other one was in the Virgin Islands and I was headed back to Roanoke


Which by the way is not on the coast --which seems to be most peoples impression of where it is located -- I heard that on the news this morning



Guestbook update


OK its been a while


Yankeebelle Shes back *chair dancing* How was Paris -- I liked it but the streets are dirty and the People are rude but Its Paris they can be rude all they want -- OK don't work to hard and all that


dancing stick man this guy is funny and thanks for the g-book sign in


Chickenpie OK I do dance with the videos, I get to see them because I get home in time to see a bit of TRL, no Chris is not my favorite one, they are guys you know I'm a guy they are guys I think they are talented and dare I say good looking but none of them really get me all like hey he is the best one -- but if I could be Justin Timberlake that would be too cool -- oh my god did I just admit to liking Nsync (reads back) OMG I did *hangs head* OK I'll have to get back to on this


flutter thanks for the sign in


action figure sorry about the math test but sounds like you had a better time later, mini golf -- I rawk at mini golf -- glad you had a good game sorry about the sunburns though I hat that I get 'em too so I stay out of the sun mostly


invisiblepal Hey how you doin' -- oh and keep up the good work on school


The Queen of Sarcasm Thanks for all the sign ins and stuff -- cheer up -- you know like they say don't sweat the small stuff and if its too big just shoot it -- or something like that


Greenicoyote Hey thanks for the sign in and for adding me to your favorite list - you rawk and the hike pictures look like you all had a blast out there -- I still like the eyes even if it is a simple thing like inverting a picture -- and the Planet of the Apes thing -- well I would like to see a sequel -- but man Tim Burton really dropped the ball on the ending.


Jeska Hey thanks for coming in and say all the really nice stuff -- She thinks Im like Uncle Bob -- OH YEAH Baby -- that makes me happy 'cause I really like to read his stuff -- Your site was cool and thanks again for the sign in


Others who came by

lobo

emberly17

brokentoy

snowgrrl liked your hair from the honeymoon --it looked nice -- and thanks for stopping in -- I read your stuff regularly and enjoy reading your perspective on your relationship -- sorry I don't read Dans

unclebob he or someone from there comes by every so often


If I forgot you I'm sorry Invisible Don wants everyone to get the props they deserve for coming to see me --so if I forgot you come back sign my guest book and say hey what about me you *&&^$*(*&)%^) I was there


OK now my headache is gone and I can work now -- oh well

Do I really care how you go through your mail

OK I am really hating being this busy all the time -- I have no time to do a decent entry and I just keep getting further behind on my guest book entry -- I just sat in an hour and half staff meeting -- the Pres listens to the development team make a pitch to have a meeting set up a certain way and why it should be done that way


He says -- Make me a pitch and then I'll go over it with the board


NO NO NO silly they just made the pitch -- you go sell it to the board now See they did that already weren't you listening


OMG -- then we got to hear about how he sorts his mails -- this of course get tied to our annual fund raising after 15 minutes


I think I'm going to go hide in the basement for the rest of the day -- which is not a really good place to go but it might be better than this right now


oh wow there was just this huge piece of peach in my yogurt mmmmmmm I like peaches OK well I have to go hide in the basement now

I'm going to get pizza and lay around on my ass

OK the Class Web site is back up and I have been working my ass off on it today -- mainly data entry, I don't know how the hell the thing works I just type and it says OK message excepted and I'm like oh yeah


-- why did I agree to do this -- oh yeah that's right


I'm into making my life a living hell --


OK so now I'm going to get pizza and lay around on my ass for the rest of the day until I go to bed and get up at 4am to go to work


Hey have fun everyone

The Peacemaker told me again that he is going to kick my ass

Oh my god the damn web site for my class is down and down in a big way of course now I can't do all the work I need to do -- stuff I've been trying to do since yesterday.


Why does this have to happen to me why why why


Oh and the Peacemaker told me again that he is going to kick my ass but he still isn't mad at me -- maybe I'm being a bit negative in all of this -- but when someone says they are going to give me a beat down I would assume they were mad at me -- I don't know maybe I'm wrong and it doesn't mean that at all


Oh well the other one is on the peacemakers bad side now too because he hasn't built a CD rack for the peacemaker -- the other one had better watch it the peacemaker might wanna give him a beat down too.


Well the bright side of all this is that I no longer have a reason to travel to WV unless I want to go site seeing --it really is a beautiful state -- but I think there might be something in the air making people insane and very aggressive.


I'll have to think about that -- well now I'm going to try to get back on that website again and if it fails go watch the Gift.

Well its a gift what can I say --

I really need to learn to keep my ESP under control


I have had so many people come up and tell me that hey I knew you would be here or there and that's why I go off my sorry ass and came down -- Or WOW I was just dialing your number and tada there you are on the phone


Well its a gift what can I say --


First I'm invisible -- most likely from birth


Then I'm Royalty -- King of the Bastards


and Now I must have ESP


When will all the madness end


What is that a --


Why yes I think it is


Its a plane

Its a ... well we aren't really sure because its invisible .. but its something


OK gotta run important King of the Bastards stuff to take care of -- most likely an ass kickin' for the peacemaker -- naw just kidding

The Basics of Wedding Car Decorating

Thursday -- Guestbook update



The Next day


OK the day before the other ones wedding was fun and we didn't go to jail -- that was even better


The day of the wedding we are all looking and feeling our best -- not getting in until 4 am for a 1pm wedding and we were staying an hour away from the church and of course being in the wedding we have to be there an hour before the thing too


Booze,Mexican Food, and 5 hours of sleep make for a very respectable looking grooms side of the wedding -- all the bride's maids had gotten plenty of sleep and were having their hair done and all that stuff before the wedding


The grooms men and the best man and the groom for that matter were -- debating on if it would be acceptable for us to start drinking before the wedding -- all of us except --- the peacemaker -- he is respectable don't you know.


So we decide better wait -- but the groom give us our grooms men gifts -- jacket flasks -- full flasks too i might add -- so our good intentions were for naught.


the trip to the wedding in the limo was uneventful we still kept the promise not to get drunk before the wedding -- and smoked cigars -- not sure why but we did


then we got to the church and got dressed -- Summer weddings in DC are HOT -- HOT HOT HOT --


So we are in the church and its HOT


Tuxes suck when its hot -- there is no other way around it.


So the wedding goes on without a problem and My brother and his now wife are married -- so now we go to the reception -- another limo ride and we can now open the flasks -- well me I don't know anyone and the brides maid I'm paired with is nice and we are talking and all so I give her the flask and ask you want a drink -- she says hell yeah and take a big pull -- then another brides maid says you know she 19 right


I say "really, I didn't know that" So I get my flask back when she hands it back to me


Someone else than points out that one of the other bridesmaids is a cop -- oh now that's great I'm in trouble with the DC area police two days in a row that's all I need -- I say "Oh well one drink isn't going to hurt anything right" then I ask the 19 yr old "wasn't your first drink either was it"


She said "no and that her dad didn't care"


I say "see" and drink another gulp from the flask -- and there wasn't a whole lot left before I took my second drink. I look over to the 19 yr old and she just smiled


Oh well


So then the reception -- food dancing some drinking and messing with the other ones car


well no one prepared for this --except me


things you need for the car on the wedding day


Rice -- bird seed is better

Soap

condoms

cheese a 1 oz. or 2 is enough -- Limburger is best

string

small rocks

Toilet paper


OK here we go start with the inside

a condom on the gear shift --automatics or manual they both have a long thing to put it on


bird seed on the seats -- not alot but some -- half a handful works -- unless its a rental then all you want.


Do not do anything to the pedals or steering wheel --we don't want our newly weds to die just be a bit upset


OK now you are done with the inside -- close the doors


Now the outside


Open the hood and find the engine block -- put the cheese there -- sardines work too -- now close the hood


Do not mess with the paint -- it really makes people very mad -- windows wash very well though so they are free game -- no shaving cream it gets from the windows to the paint and then why did you not put it there to begin with -- No shaving cream


Posters and tape this works and it makes the job faster and you can be creative at home and take your time writing witty things.


String to tie various things that make noise to the bumper -- use small things and bring a knife in case they insist you cut it free before they leave the parking lot.


Toilet paper is to be wrapped around everything you can wrap it around -- it bio degrades very quickly and is easily removable later too -- so bring lots of that


Soap on the window is good write what you like but don't do the middle of the wind shield -- it goes back to the dying thing


Suggestions for the windows


Grooms window -- Shot gun wedding

Brides Window -- Help -- I'm not really married to this guy


Now pray your buddy, pal, friend, or relative has a sun roof -- why


because you can pile the bird seed on this and cover it with the wrapped TP -- then when they open the sunroof it rains bird seed in the car --which is fun -- well it is for those watching.


Tires -- put as few small rocks in the hub caps -- it makes a pleasantly annoying noise which will most like continue for weeks after the wedding.


You can add various other things as well but this basic package is all you really need to have an impressive wedding car -- but beware you may have to hire a security guard for your house at Halloween -- because pay backs are hell


I have one more story about this wedding which I will do in a later entry

___________________________________________________


Guestbook update


Chickenpie Well I guess I let it out of the bag that I knew there were 6 of the covers -- yikes


sunshine17 a well hope you are having a great time and Im not up to much but working, working, working and oh yes screwing around at work. I know my entries are really long aren't they -- oh well


YankeeBelle Where are you??????


savecraig spent part of my afternoon reading this guys diary -- it is worth a look -- very funny stuff


I had a person from the US Senate checking my site out the other day -- man I love stats - and to see that my tax dollars at work are spent on a worth while cause.


others who visited

Magistrate

the fierce one

M

Invisiblepal

meadow

sappygurl

gossamer

Allie

thanks all you guys and gals -- you make invisible don so happy -- i know I have no life -- but I'm happy


UncleBob well I get a lot of links from his site -- which I love but I think he might have come by too -- which is way too cool


A bunch of other people too which I don't know and can't figure out by the stats -- but hey thanks for stopping by


And USC.edu was visiting


and I got a bunch more google hits -- curse words and video game references -- who knew


Well that's about it I'm off in a few hours -- and will be enjoying the weekend after 4pm EST -- What will I do in Roanoke -- be bored out of my mind most likely -- no just kidding I will find something to do. Oh and Don Walker a DJ at Z101 -- you are really a pain in my ears -- just so you know

Two drivers and three passengers with the windows down jamming to loud music in a YUGO at 3 am

Wednesday -- Guestbook


Well my students all showed up to take there-- with the exception of one -- oh well doom and gloom in the forecast for the lad I am afraid.


The Peacemaker is still HOT oh well so sad for him


The other one says "Oh well too"


So I left work and I'm driving home a black cat runs in front of me -- well the cat isn't completely black -- it has white paws and a white patch on its chest -- is that still a black cat?


I have no idea what to write here now


The city I live in Roanoke, Va -- its small as far as cities go-- only 100,000 people -- which means that every single person here would fit into the soccer stadium in Rio and it is not so boring but you just get into a rut after living someplace for a while -- you know.


So I'm still drawing a blank _______(get it Ha Ha)

__________________________________________________


OK this is really long so you may not want to read all of this page down


OK a story which we (me and the other one) talked about this weekend.


Well oddly enough the peacemaker is in this one too, but since he isn't talking to me he didn't talk about this past weekend.


It all begins the day before my brothers wedding -- the other one -- of course this is about the infamous bachelor parties that happen the day before weddings.


We decide to meet at this Mexican restaurant near the other ones house -- after many helpings of burritos, tacos, and various other Mexican entries and many pints of our favorite beer (Guinness) It is now time to head out to a dancing Establishment -- we asked our server at the restaurant if she would like to come with us -- sadly she declined.


The we in all this is yours truly invisible don, the other one, the peacemaker, the best man, and the bride to be's brother


We are all travelling in a YUGO -- Yes that's right a YUGO


Well the other ones brother in law now is the plan maker -- mistake one


He can't remember how to get to the club -- the peacemaker is also our DD -- see we are safe -- he doesn't know the DC area.


Well we pull over and pick a club out of the phone book -- mistake 2


Never pick a club out of the phone book, unless you confirm it with someone else. It was not a good place -- however the other one was getting married the next day and wanted to see naked ladies dancing.


So we stayed -- the first girl out -- it was her first day -- she should have really considered another career -- maybe she did


girl number 2 was our mothers age --yikes


well none of us are really paying any attention -- but the other one is like a kid in a candy shop because the rule was only he could get the attention from the dancers -- our rule not the clubs.


Well the dancers didn't get much better or younger as the night went on -- the now brother in law finally remembers where we were supposed to go to being with -- so we gladly leave the first place


In the parking lot a guy is sitting in his car next to the YUGO well 5 guys don't exactly slide into a YUGO so we have to see what happens while we are getting into our car


Guy parked in the lot in his car has a penis pump -- yup that right and he is using it -- and is not deterred by the fact that 5 other people are now standing around


It was like being a deer in head lights you could make yourself look away


PUMP PUMP PUMP


Well he was nearly finished when we got there which we found out when the guy stopped pumping remove a hose from the side and ......



sucked up his own cum *SHUDDER*



Well we were able to get into the YUGO much faster now and drove off in a really big hurry


Mistake number 3 -- when leaving a really bad club to go to a better one you should check the time -- we didn't so when we got to the really better club it was closed


Well now we are in the middle of DC on like M street or something


Now driving in DC is not that hard but you should really have a map if you aren't from there -- we didn't


Brother in law to be also has some thing about not stopping at red lights at 3 am in Washington DC -- so peacemaker stops at all of them -- brother in law to be steps over and pushes the gas down


we spin out into every intersection


Well all of us in the back the other one best man and invisible me are just sort of wedged into the YUGO and can't do much but we are well warmed by the nights refreshments and telling jokes and not really paying attention to the driving by both the driver and the passenger This all would be the next mistake


two drivers and three passengers with the windows down jamming to loud music in a YUGO at 3 am is going to get someones attention


We did just about the time we are in the middle of Alexandria -- the attention we received was in the form of three police cars -- two officers each


the peacemaker didn't pull over for them when he first saw them thinking they were going to go by him so he kept driving


The police pulled up beside us and began to tell us to pull over then work their car closer to ours forcing us to pull over.


Well you would think the fun ended here Nope


Best Man asks the other one how he thinks his bride to be will take it if he is in jail for the wedding.


We all laugh except the peacemaker who is attempting to explain that he is the DD and hasn't had anything to drink


Here is where it gets interesting We are in a YUGO with Maryland tags, it belongs to future brother in laws girl friend -- she has registered the car to Virginia but doesn't have plates


So Maryland Plates Virginia registration and


Peacemaker is a resident of WV -- he has a West Virginia Drivers License -- plus the car doesn't belong to anyone in the car -- and the girlfriend has already moved again so the address on the registration is already wrong and brother in law to be doesn't know her current address and doesn't really know how to spell her last name -- he and she had had a fight about that earlier


Police officer 1 of 6 decides to give us a fighting chance and offers a spelling of the name -- brother in law to be says "NOPE That's not it" -- we in the back laugh -- not helping the mood of the police officers -- we are sure we are going to jail and can't stop laughing because this is not even funny but it is because this will really mess up the wedding which is not funny either -- We now have been surrounded by officer 2 3 4 and 5


Officer 1 is making a phone call and officer 6 is giving our DD a field sobriety test -- which the peacemaker isn't passing because he is scared out of his mind because we are now going to jail in the DC area or so he thinks -- finally they do a breath test on him because he has failed all the field tests -- which thankfully reveals he is indeed not like the rest of us.


But not before brother in law to be puts us one step closer to jail -- officer 1 comes back and says "no one is answering at the number you gave us do you know why"


Brother in law to be says "Maybe because it is 330 in the morning and they are asleep."


Officer 1 say "shut up" We say "OK" and try really really hard not to laugh but we don't succeed with that


the officer were kind enough to let us leave Alexandria in our YUGO with a police escort out of the area and very real warning about not being seen anywhere else or we would be in jail very quickly


Well we still didn't stop laughing at that either but we were really glad we weren't in jail. Have an interesting bachelor party story let me know in the guestbook.


pagedown


VASCO VASCO VASCO -- if you know what it is OK -- if you don't sorry



Guestbook update


lobo Oh well hey you are the first one for the second 100. The wild west is reborn my hat is red actually and say machete -- ironically enough it was a gift from the peacemaker


chickenpie Well at least you only want one of them -- and aren't trying for all six -- you aren't trying to get all six are you -- don't worry I'll never tell -- does this count?


savecraig Hey thanks I like the title too -- No its from Vagrant Story


invisiblepal Ok I guess I will get used to it -- but I'm sure the typing won't be the same now -- you know hair has so much to do with typing.


M Do you really want letters?