Thursday -- Guestbook update
The Next day
OK the day before the other ones wedding was fun and we didn't go to jail -- that was even better
The day of the wedding we are all looking and feeling our best -- not getting in until 4 am for a 1pm wedding and we were staying an hour away from the church and of course being in the wedding we have to be there an hour before the thing too
Booze,Mexican Food, and 5 hours of sleep make for a very respectable looking grooms side of the wedding -- all the bride's maids had gotten plenty of sleep and were having their hair done and all that stuff before the wedding
The grooms men and the best man and the groom for that matter were -- debating on if it would be acceptable for us to start drinking before the wedding -- all of us except --- the peacemaker -- he is respectable don't you know.
So we decide better wait -- but the groom give us our grooms men gifts -- jacket flasks -- full flasks too i might add -- so our good intentions were for naught.
the trip to the wedding in the limo was uneventful we still kept the promise not to get drunk before the wedding -- and smoked cigars -- not sure why but we did
then we got to the church and got dressed -- Summer weddings in DC are HOT -- HOT HOT HOT --
So we are in the church and its HOT
Tuxes suck when its hot -- there is no other way around it.
So the wedding goes on without a problem and My brother and his now wife are married -- so now we go to the reception -- another limo ride and we can now open the flasks -- well me I don't know anyone and the brides maid I'm paired with is nice and we are talking and all so I give her the flask and ask you want a drink -- she says hell yeah and take a big pull -- then another brides maid says you know she 19 right
I say "really, I didn't know that" So I get my flask back when she hands it back to me
Someone else than points out that one of the other bridesmaids is a cop -- oh now that's great I'm in trouble with the DC area police two days in a row that's all I need -- I say "Oh well one drink isn't going to hurt anything right" then I ask the 19 yr old "wasn't your first drink either was it"
She said "no and that her dad didn't care"
I say "see" and drink another gulp from the flask -- and there wasn't a whole lot left before I took my second drink. I look over to the 19 yr old and she just smiled
Oh well
So then the reception -- food dancing some drinking and messing with the other ones car
well no one prepared for this --except me
things you need for the car on the wedding day
Rice -- bird seed is better
Soap
condoms
cheese a 1 oz. or 2 is enough -- Limburger is best
string
small rocks
Toilet paper
OK here we go start with the inside
a condom on the gear shift --automatics or manual they both have a long thing to put it on
bird seed on the seats -- not alot but some -- half a handful works -- unless its a rental then all you want.
Do not do anything to the pedals or steering wheel --we don't want our newly weds to die just be a bit upset
OK now you are done with the inside -- close the doors
Now the outside
Open the hood and find the engine block -- put the cheese there -- sardines work too -- now close the hood
Do not mess with the paint -- it really makes people very mad -- windows wash very well though so they are free game -- no shaving cream it gets from the windows to the paint and then why did you not put it there to begin with -- No shaving cream
Posters and tape this works and it makes the job faster and you can be creative at home and take your time writing witty things.
String to tie various things that make noise to the bumper -- use small things and bring a knife in case they insist you cut it free before they leave the parking lot.
Toilet paper is to be wrapped around everything you can wrap it around -- it bio degrades very quickly and is easily removable later too -- so bring lots of that
Soap on the window is good write what you like but don't do the middle of the wind shield -- it goes back to the dying thing
Suggestions for the windows
Grooms window -- Shot gun wedding
Brides Window -- Help -- I'm not really married to this guy
Now pray your buddy, pal, friend, or relative has a sun roof -- why
because you can pile the bird seed on this and cover it with the wrapped TP -- then when they open the sunroof it rains bird seed in the car --which is fun -- well it is for those watching.
Tires -- put as few small rocks in the hub caps -- it makes a pleasantly annoying noise which will most like continue for weeks after the wedding.
You can add various other things as well but this basic package is all you really need to have an impressive wedding car -- but beware you may have to hire a security guard for your house at Halloween -- because pay backs are hell
I have one more story about this wedding which I will do in a later entry
___________________________________________________
Guestbook update
Chickenpie Well I guess I let it out of the bag that I knew there were 6 of the covers -- yikes
sunshine17 a well hope you are having a great time and Im not up to much but working, working, working and oh yes screwing around at work. I know my entries are really long aren't they -- oh well
YankeeBelle Where are you??????
savecraig spent part of my afternoon reading this guys diary -- it is worth a look -- very funny stuff
I had a person from the US Senate checking my site out the other day -- man I love stats - and to see that my tax dollars at work are spent on a worth while cause.
others who visited
Magistrate
the fierce one
M
Invisiblepal
meadow
sappygurl
gossamer
Allie
thanks all you guys and gals -- you make invisible don so happy -- i know I have no life -- but I'm happy
UncleBob well I get a lot of links from his site -- which I love but I think he might have come by too -- which is way too cool
A bunch of other people too which I don't know and can't figure out by the stats -- but hey thanks for stopping by
And USC.edu was visiting
and I got a bunch more google hits -- curse words and video game references -- who knew
Well that's about it I'm off in a few hours -- and will be enjoying the weekend after 4pm EST -- What will I do in Roanoke -- be bored out of my mind most likely -- no just kidding I will find something to do. Oh and Don Walker a DJ at Z101 -- you are really a pain in my ears -- just so you know
Thursday, August 2, 2001
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