Sign in, the police may want to know where you were about now

On being invisible

This is perhaps one of the most under appreciated physical characteristics anyone can have.
Let me 'splain

First -- I don't really think that I'm invisible -- this would be nice at times but I am a real boy
No strings see (holds out arm for inspection)

Second -- clothing is never a problem you can wear just about anything you want and it doesn't matter. If you truly think you are invisible try this experiment wear a striped shirt and plaid pants in public -- if no one says anything you are probably invisible or your friends have no fashion sense -- be careful here as there are many people with out a sense of fashion I am one of them.

Third -- you can find out anything about what's going on anywhere -- simply walk up to a seemingly important conversation and just stand there and listen -- it's amazing what people will say when they don't see you even in their line of sight.
If someone begins to look at you just calmly look at the speaker and point to your ear as if you really need to hear every single word they are saying.
If person speaking is looking at you smile and nod, everyone who is running there mouth off about something important wants to know that there are people who agree with them.

Fourth -- You never have to remember people’s names because they will never remember meeting you in the first place --it's not because you aren't a dynamic person -- you are just outside their range of view

Fifth -- You can be late or on time for something, people rarely remember if you were there or not -- just sign the guestbook because you may need an alibi later and if you can get in a photo or two that's always helpful.

Guestbooks are easy to find -- right when you walk in -- just like mine (so sign in the police may want to know where you were about now)

The photo thing is easy too just follow these simple steps
A -- find out where the most "important people" are at the function
B -- hang out near them not hovering but near them
C -- Watch to see the photo hounds sniffing and as they pull up the camera
D -- just walk toward the person but slightly behind don't worry you'll be in the shot.

Sixth --the most important thing about being invisible is you always know that you are the only person really having a good time. Because all the not-invisible-people are worried that they will do something wrong. Being invisible even if you do something wrong you'll not be blamed or even noticed -- unless you want to be.

There is the beauty of being invisible you are seen when you want to be seen, unnoticed when you don't need to be seen.

Sometimes you do get locked into places but that is a whole different game

One tip for the not invisible -- how to notice an invisible person -- the person just behind you in your wedding album that you swear is your wife’s cousin and she thinks its your friend from college that's an invisible person. We are having all the fun.

Anyway that’s about it on being invisible -- I can't tell you how to become invisible or they will throw me out of the trade union and the benefits do come in handy -- especially when you aren't seen by a car when crossing the street.